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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Hi, everyone :)

I have two dogs. Haven is about 1 1/2 years old and Lily is 6 months old. I have a few places in the house where the dogs like to sleep. There are a couple of beds that I made throughout the house but there is a favorite that I made for Haven when he first came to live with me. He loves his bed so I keep it in the living room where we spend most of our time. If Lily tries to lay on it while he is on it he will growl at her. I don't know how I should handle this. When he does it I say No Growling and he stops. If she tries to do it later in the day, though, he will do it again. He *always* looks at me when he does this like he knows Momma is going to yell. I'm not sure how to handle this.
 

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These bullies can be possesive of "their stuff". My Clara is and it took me about a month before I figured out how to handle it. First you have to teach the other dog to leave her stuff alone. If at any time the other dog is going near her bed you say, UH-UH, LILY NO, LEAVE IT BE. She will learn that YOU do not want her near that bed. Second, if Haven even looks cross eyed at Lily, you do the same thing: UH-UH, HAVEN NO, LEAVE HER BE. You cannot train them not to be possesive, but you can train them to respect each other and definately you. At this point in time, my other dogs do not go near any of Clara's toys or food or bed. But at one point if they had accidently gotten too close, she would have jumped them, now she just leaves them be to walk by it. She has learned that they have a right to walk around the house and they have learned that she has a right to her stuff. Not been easy but has been done. Even in the wild, dogs/wolves learn to respect each other and that is what has to be taught here.
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
This isnt like toy aggression or food aggrassion? I am afraid that if I allow him to tell her "no, this is my bed" then he will think it is ok to tell her "no, this is mine, and this is mine, and THIS is mine". It isn't Lily that is doing anything wrong by wanting to sleep where she wants just as he can. It is Haven that is acting like a brat. So, I shouldnt tell him no?

I know they are possessive but they shouldnt be allowed to in my home, right? Or am I expecting too much?
 

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FavoriteKitty said:
This isnt like toy aggression or food aggrassion? I am afraid that if I allow him to tell her "no, this is my bed" then he will think it is ok to tell her "no, this is mine, and this is mine, and THIS is mine". It isn't Lily that is doing anything wrong by wanting to sleep where she wants just as he can. It is Haven that is acting like a brat. So, I shouldnt tell him no?

I know they are possessive but they shouldnt be allowed to in my home, right? Or am I expecting too much?
No he is not allowed to tell her, you are. You tell Lily to leave the bed alone and you tell Haven to leave Lily alone. It is exactly like toy and food aggression but I think of it more as a protective issue than just an "i want to get in a fight with you" issue. To me that is aggression, when they just forcibly, for no reason, want to fight. In this case, they do not want to fight, they just want "their stuff" left alone and if that means a tussle, then so be it. Like two toddlers fighting over the same toy. The kid who had it first is going to be the one to grab and hit. They just have to be taught that they cannot do that. In kids they will understand what you are telling them - dogs do not relate to "you must share". So they must respect. :wink:

p.s. I do think that you are expecting too much if you want bull dogs to share - they won't. It is not in their nature. You gave that bed to Haven before Lily was in the picture. It is his bed and she needs to respect that. She needs her own bed and that is where she is to lay down, and Haven needs to respect that.
 

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FavoriteKitty said:
This isnt like toy aggression or food aggrassion? I am afraid that if I allow him to tell her "no, this is my bed" then he will think it is ok to tell her "no, this is mine, and this is mine, and THIS is mine". It isn't Lily that is doing anything wrong by wanting to sleep where she wants just as he can. It is Haven that is acting like a brat. So, I shouldnt tell him no?

I know they are possessive but they shouldnt be allowed to in my home, right? Or am I expecting too much?
That is going to happen anyway. It's their way of remaining "top" or "alpha" in their own home. It's YOUR job to try to keep the peace, but reinforce the alpha status, so by telling him he CAN'T defend his things, he's going to be messed up worse!
Something to keep in mind is it is YOUR house and YOU decide who lays where. If it's going to cause a knock-down-drag-out then remove the beds totally. It's not "fair" in our eyes but dogs don't think like that.
He's looking at YOU to reinforce his alpha status, not because you're going to yell at him. She's too young to be alpha, she'll NEVER EVER be alpha, so you need to teach HER to respect his space, and his "things".
So you teach the girl it's not cool or even OK to challenge him for his bed. Either help her understand, and reinforce his position as alpha between them, or remove the beds.
 
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